dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
