There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
