I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
