This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
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