Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
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