I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Randomize
