giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
