the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
