Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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