At least make sure they are 18
Why
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
