just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
