I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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