Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
