exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Randomize
