yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize