Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
