Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
There was a lot of him and a little penis
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize