Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
too bad you live with your parents still
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I'm gonna fight the coyote
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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