part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
