Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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