I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Just high enough for therapy.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
