The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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