How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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