Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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