Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
