I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
