At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Vodka?
Forever.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
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