I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just pynch a tree in the face
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
