I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize