I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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