Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Still dying that you shit outside
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize