Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Randomize
