At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize
