I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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