You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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