She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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