The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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