Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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