Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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