Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
