Can i not drive my cunt home
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
