Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
