There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
