He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize
