barbara walters just said penis...
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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