me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Randomize
