it wasn't lemon gatorade
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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