How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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