I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
