can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
