i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
