Need sex. Gaining weight.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
porn star boner night. come get it.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
